Homeless Millennial Survives By Picking Up Women Every Night [Insights]

Homeless Millennial Survives By Picking Up Women Every Night [Insights]

If you were homeless, could you still pick up chicks?

Meet Joe, the homeless Millennial who has mastered the art of getting women to take him home with them.

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Originally from Boston, Joe, 26, may spend his daylight hours panhandling in Manhattan making up to $150 on a given day but his nights are a completely different ballgame.

If you dont think Joe looks homeless, well, thats only because hes good at what he does. According to Joe, his only responsibility is to not look homeless. In his mind, his appearance is a survival tactic.

Joe spends whatever money he makes on keeping his appearance up, in addition to copious amounts of drugs and booze, with one goal in mind: attract as many girls as possible.

For Joe, sleeping with a lady is his only chance at sleeping with a roof over his head. Joe uses his charm and good looks to sleep out with chicks three to four nights a week, where hell shower and enjoy an evening away from the streets.

After meeting Joe about a block from our office the Elite Daily Video Team spent over a week with him, chronicling his epic lifestyle and learning about the hardships and triumphs of one cardboard all star.

Producers: Dan Scotti, Max Grunner

Director of Photography: Terence MF Thomas

Associate Producer: Tyler Gildin

Editors: Terence MF Thomas, Andrew St. Clair

Senior Editor: Greg Parker

Sound Recordist: Sean Horan

Sound Design: Greg Parker

Additional Photography: Sean Horan

Executive Producer: Weston Green

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We proclaim ourselves to be the voice of Generation-Y and never disappoint.

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DISCLAIMER: Joe did not go home or have any other interaction with the woman at 0:14.

Prefer text?

since there’s 8 million people in this city if you’re not getting laid you’re fucking asshole it sounded like I forgot how to get pussy just because I fucking became homeless I like your shorts what’s your name the inner city is amazing and I was eight million people and it’s a few like fuck a different girl like whenever you want you’re adorable I’m definitely tired show there’s got to be the one pick up line that works better than everything else you say it sound really pickup lines more like I see opportunities on capitalise I’m actually a little bit Czechoslovakian that’s kind of rush dude I’ll go up to any random girl here tell him I’m talking love and I want to marry him just for general recreation purposes I love you you’re fucking killing it what usually like dictates how long like a girl will let you bunk up in their place it’s pretty much all depends on how good at the pie pie last what yeah I did if I lay the good pipe you know I’m fucking usually in there for a few days I was sleeping at this broads house and last night we just ate a shitload of cloud friends or drinking fucking eating lobster rolls like classy individuals when you’re not sleeping with a lady though where do you sleep on the sidewalk cardboard cardboard all star Joe’s homeless and unlike any other homeless guy you’ve ever seen a 26 year old clean cut millennial from Boston living on streets in New York City but he makes 150 bucks a day Bayonetta to sleep comfortably and stay clean Joe picks up women three to four nights a week and goes home with them after hearing a story I decided I had to spend some time documenting his day to day activities I do homelessness differently you know I’m sorry I might sleep on cardboard like two or three nights a week but I literally wake up every single day to do whatever the fuck I want give me the daily Joe agenda daily Joe Gemma okay if I wake up with money in my pocket I go get two four lokos I’m talking five o’clock six o’clock in the morning say yeah so you’re an early riser like if you’re sleeping on the sidewalk you have to wake up when the Sun comes up or you get bitched out my responsibility is to try and I go to CVS and I fucking take their hair job you know they have the mirrors near the main that stretches like fucking fix my hand I grab a red ball and I walk out how many outfits do you have how many ensembles I have four pretty good outfits or pretty good outfits how many like fantastic I have no bad outfits it’s going on buddy how you doing sir I just want the worst vodka possible I’m mixing it with Gatorade so it doesn’t really matter what kind of vodka I play I’m gonna go drink this right now and get belligerently shit it’s a no young people in fuck girls dude once I get drunk all bets are off like anyone’s been beating anything can happen once that happened if I strike out on like a weekend night right it’ll be like seven o’clock in the morning like girls will go wake me up and they’ll be like yo you passed out on the sidewalk you need to go home I’m like fuckin I’m home the ones in the other corner am i got home homes right I was right there but I didn’t make it to that part of the sidewalk so I’m over here Geo became homeless after his mom found a stash of drugs in his bedroom and kicked him out of the house according to Joe he was only trying to make ends meet but I guess it finally caught up with him I don’t even like to consider myself a bomb what you can see something I don’t know a gypsy I try and maintain as much humanity as I can despite this fucking situation you know have a great night god bless you that was me donating money to somebody go get a hot dog don’t do anything I want to do right life’s all about karma like I think I do the right thing and then good shit like the universe reciprocate stay out buddy so yeah when you see when you see a homeless person when you’re walking and it’s a veteran you feel guilty doing what you’re doing not not off not even a little bit through there’s enough money out here for everybody if you’re a type person who inspires compassion then people are gonna give you money the reason why people give me the amount of money they do is because they realize that they’re just a bad fucking close to becoming homeless you know what I’m saying I would just not do drugs and not drink for a week I could go get a fucking mic house but like how can you be homeless and not do drugs and drink like I feel like the misery we’re just fucking overwhelm you know what what would you tell the youth of America never become like me ever why why this abstract lifestyle is not for everybody and I’m pretty sure like if you look around you at the fucking hundreds of thousands of homeless people in New York City I’m the only one that can really pull this shit off Brent’s been diagnosed with cancer yeah so that was that was when I found out the news our seizures that do not respond like this okay okay..

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Comment (11)

  1. this guy beat life .. don’t gotta pay bills, don’t gotta work, picks up a chick almost every night, they feed him. I think he won


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